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You might recognize the title of this article as something your mom (or anyone else,) might have said to you when you kept bothering a scab or wound. It's true...if you fuss with a wound, pick at it, keep bothering it with your dirty fingers, it takes longer to heal, and can even get infected. I think most of us old enough to be reading this here blog understand this.
So, why do you keep bothering that situation you're working on with spells (especially that love situation)? Are you worrying at it? Are you checking the social media of others involved? Getting lots of psychic readings? Keeping yourself up at night trying to figure out what is going on? Do you often worry on your next move? Do you worry why it's not knitting together as it should?
Well...then, my lovely, stop picking at that. Apply the treatment, and let it knit together as fast and as well as it can by leaving that situation alone after that, OK?
Time again, for a Questions You've Asked Me article. :D
Q: I have found a dead bird in front of my house. I think I'm cursed. I also had a spider crawl on me, so I must be cursed, right?
A: I often get mails about an unfortunate dead bird (who probably ran into the window and broke its neck,) at least 2x a month, and usually the person decides this means a curse, and not just that a bird ran into a window thinking the reflection meant it wasn't a solid surface. I find that most often (in fact, in every case where I've been presented with this scenario,) that the bird died of the afore mentioned accident, or otherwise disease, OR was the "gift" of a neighborhood kitty (or your own kitty,) and that this is in no way a spell. Also, if you notice crows, or saw a bat flying, or had a spider crawl on you, this is almost always not a curse on you. What is happening is that an animal happened to be in the same place as you. Now, as someone who lives in a rural area, if I thought I was cursed every time I saw a crow (a flock of them live right near my house), a spider (I hate spiders in my house, but again, lotsa spiders around here,) a dead bird (um, have indoor/outdoor cats, always have,) or saw a bat in flight at dusk, I'd already be institutionalized. ;) Instead, I realize that I share this planet with lots of other creatures, and some of them die (and I see their remains,) some of them try to live in my home, and some even crawl on me and scare the crap out of me when I'm watching Netflix at 1am. (You know who you are, bad spider!)
I hate to say this, but almost every single person who ever asked me if they were cursed was just imagining themselves cursed, did not at all describe the behavior of a cursed person, and was often a bit...er...paranoid. I will say if you think you're cursed, it's at least a 95% chance you are not...because that suits the numbers in the amount of people who've asked me in 10 years if they were cursed to the small tiny number that actually were.
Q: I was told to look for pictures in the drippings of my candle wax when using a free-standing candle. I can't see a picture, though, I think maybe this is a lima bean exploding? What does that mean?
A: Whoever told you to project that a sign will come out of your candle wax every time you cast a spell is a silly bear who probably wants to either sell you something, or does not understand how wax sign works. I've been over this before. ;)
So, when you get wax sign, it looks like something - the image will pop out at you immediately. Like, you walk over to your container where the candle has burnt down, and you go "Holy crap, it's shaped like a person!" or "Holy crap, that looks like a bunny!" (Here, can you see the shape that looks like an Easter bunny?)
How this is NOT done is by looking for a sign. See, it's not a Rorschach test. You are not seeking an image. If an image pops out at you the moment you come over, then yeah, that might mean something. If you're sitting there trying to decipher any possible image (which generally would be doing nothing other than projecting a sign where there is no sign,) don't expect your "findings" to be valid indication of any sign.
Remember what I always say about signs. If you seek signs, you project signs where they do not exist.
Q: What is the strongest spell for (named desire)?
A: The question as stated actually makes me shudder, lol, and also illustrates the querent's ignorance in regards to spellcasting in general. (Sorry, I had to say it.) :(
I'm sure I've actually gone over this, but for the last few months, I've been inundated with several questions JUST LIKE THE ABOVE from people who are too new to spellcasting (that's most of you,) too lazy to do their own research, too emotionally traumatized, too mentally unwell, too-willfully-ignorant, or are just self-entitled askholes lately, so let's go over this again. ;)
There is no "strongest love spell" that will suit all love situations. There is no strongest money spell that will suit all money situations. Heck, there's not even a strongest best curse, strongest best reconciliation spell, or any strongest type of any spell.
But why is that? Well...because without diagnosing the situation, without seeing all of the obstacles to manifestation (or trying to,) without choosing the best triggers for manifestion of the desired outcome, without taking into account all people who may be involved, without assessing the reasons this condition to be changed exists, and without taking into account several factors, one cannot choose the BEST spell for one's situation.
So, if you broke up with someone and want them back? Yep, the previous sentence is not enough information to know what spells would be best-suited to bringing back your lover.
Can't find a job? Well, without knowing why that is (are you unqualified? Is it a shrinking job sector? Are you living in an area where your desired profession is not in demand, etc) you won't be able to figure out which is the best job spell for your situation.
Want the best break up curse there is? Well, do you care if both parties of that couple get into legal trouble for having publicly had a physical altercation where both assaulted each other? Because that is a very good possibility if you use some break up curses as opposed to other break up curses.
Without extensive knowledge of the issue, there is no way someone can give you the BEST spells for your situation, and there is NO SUCH THING as a one-size-fits-all-problems-of-this-very-general-kind-of-problem spell. The only way to find the BEST spell is to look at the problem individually, and to judge how to change the situation to your (or the petitioner's) liking by using triggers which will bring about this desired outcome
So, there is no very general purpose, one size fits all for every similar problem, that's the strongest spell there is for that very-general type of problem, OK? Don't ask. The problem needs to be diagnosed and treated, much like an illness. :P
Q: I've read that you've said everyone has "noob-moments," yourself included, so can you tell me one?
A: I can and I will. :) Many years ago, when I was still but a girl and a still yet somewhat of a noob (hehe), I decided to use a spell where I would bring back an ex by trying to use his passion for me. I used A LOT OF RED, and A STRONG MARTIAN (Mars) INFLUENCE. Annnnd I kinda sorta didn't think about how like Mars isn't just about sexy-type passions, it's also a lot of war, and fighting, and anger is a passion, too. Yeah, no, I was thinking more about that man's sexy-lusty feelings for me, and not so much about the fact that we were FIGHTING ALL THE TIME ANYHOW!
(Yes, I'm using capitals to yell at my past self. Don't judge me.)
I started this spell on a Tuesday night, it was a relatively simple-set-up candle spell type of spell, used Mars symbols, herbs relating to Mars, the word passion, other sigils that meant passion, and of course this spell just went FAST. All spell-candles immediately melted like butter. I was done getting ready to go out in the maybe a half an hour to an hour it took to burn out. So, I think to myself "Cat's gonna get some! And he's gonna looooooove me!"
Anyhow, I didn't expect it to manifest immediately, but felt it would manifest quickly.
Days later (I think it was like 3-4 days later at most, - I may be misremembering as this was well-over a decade ago, and it may be the same night,) I saw my target. He was with a shared friend, and the shared friend and I were talking. Meanwhile, my target was SO RUDE, saying anything snarly and awful that he could during mine and our shared friend's conversation, and trying to pick a fight. Since I was young, and a bit thick back then (ask a few people I used to date, lol,) and not known for taking hints, I just kept talking to the shared friend while this guy who was my target acted the asshole. Finally, I had enough, and I was like "(Target's name,) what the fuck!? I'm seriously just like, talking here. Why don't you leave!?" Our shared friend (a female) was very upset and started to cry, fearing what would happen next (oh, and she was also drunk, lol.) The target says something really rude like "Whatever, cunt!" And I took his drunk ass by the shoulder, turned him around and nudged him towards the stairs, with the words "I said, just leave!" Unfortunately, in his drunkenness, he was clumsy, and he slipped down the stairs, grabbing my ankle, and this grab brought me tumbling down the stairs, too. Well, I'd had enough, and so I started swinging as we were rolling down these stairs to the bottom. When I started, he started swinging, too, all the way down the stairs, and out into the street below. He denies the ankle grab was intentional, and those present had said to me that it looked entirely intentional.
This was the time I beat the ass of a 6'3" man (I'm 5'2 2/3") who was a semi-pro running back, definitely not weak, to my 105 lbs when soaking wet tiny self. I beat him up in front of everyone on a Friday night, on the most popular party street of my college's town, so that pretty much everyone who went to my relatively-small college watched as he had his ass kicked by a little girl, and then, when I bested him (you bet I made him admit he was beat before I let him go,) he went running home crying, screaming "You bitch, you cunt!" the whole way, and sobbing. He later denied he even fought back, to which I showed him my bruises. Yes, we're still friends, lol, though we were not for awhile after that.
I can't remember if I ever got into a physical altercation after that (at least never for any other reason but self-defense, and even then I'm unsure I did fight ever after that,) but seeing as I was 20-21 when this happened, and about too old to get into fights anyhow, and that I don't think I'll ever best that (OMG, that guy was a foot taller and totally muscular, and I BEAT HIS ASS!) I have often said that this was the moment I retired from fist-fighting. I'll just never do better than that.
However, as you can see, I had used WAY WAY WAY TOO MUCH Mars energy, and it would seem the passions that I enflamed that night just happened to be the passions that were our anger and resentment towards each other, combined with our desire to fight each other physically - a desire we both wisely had repressed until my asshattery and over use of Mars' influence opened that up in both of us. Mind you, this guy is super super nice, this is entirely out of character for him (and totally was at the time, too,) he doesn't hit girls (never heard of him doing it before or after,) and I'd still, to this day, tell you that he is a big sweetie. Oh, and that I kicked his monkey-ass! I made him my bitch in the street! Hells, yeah! (I'm proud of it, hehe.)
Oh....and you should know...this was the third time a Mars-energy-laden spell ended up being "passionate" in a war-like way for me. Also, it was the last time I ever did use Mars for passion...at least in such a strong way.
Wasn't I a silly noob? (Who also kicked ass!)
The noobishness here is that I was blind to how over-use of a Mars influence could easily turn into war and fighting...when Mars is the God of War. :P Yeah, oh, and third time's a charm, because the previous 2 times to this episode that I'd used a lot of Mars influence on a love sitch, it ended in a shoving match, each time started by the target.
I will say this one "failed." I didn't reconcile the guy with that spell. It did produce an effect, just obviously not a reconciliatory one. So, second noob problem? I used Mars-energy (Mars being the god of war) for reconciliation (reconciliation should not be equated with war.) What a dummy I was sometimes, huh? ;)
Q: Can I use a used cigarette butt for a personal item?
A: Yes, definitely. I tend to use these mostly for things which involve getting a person to speak up, or getting a gossip to have their gossip turn against them. If it involves speech, or the mouth, it's a wonderful personal item. It can be used for other uses as well, but that's my primary use of this item.
Q: If I crack an egg for cooking purposes, and it has blood in it, is this a bad sign?
A: If you've not used this item ritually, it's probably not anything mystical whatsoever. It's just gross. :P What happened is that egg was probably fertilized before it got in your fridge. Ick. However, if you are concerned, you should try taking a spiritual bath for cleansing off bad energies. If you continue to experience bad luck, you may want to try spiritually cleansing your home with a floor wash (many can be used on walls as well,) and taking a cleansing bath for 7 straight days.
HOWEVER, it's probably just a bad egg. It happens. :/
Q: Will you ever write a book?
A: I'd love to. What needs to happen is that I need to take a sabbatical from work to do that, and have enough money for said sabbatical. ;) I do have a few half-finished manuscripts, but after writing the same stuff over and over, it gets a bit tired to write about it in my spare time in book form. Sooooo, if I had like 3 months off of work? You bet I would write a book! :D
Q: Why are you such a bitch sometimes? I mean, someone who helps people should never ever be bitchy or angry or react sourly to anything or anyone, regardless of that person or thing's behavior, right?
A: Hmm, why is it I get to be a bitch sometimes? It's probably from dealing with people who assume I should do my job for free, people who don't follow posted protocol (and get offended or contrary when asked to,) or who spend 5 days telling me I'm a cunt because I refused their case, or maybe it's because I also have a life outside of my job which, just like yours, gets pretty shitty sometimes.
So, let me ask you - why are you such a bitch sometimes? Feel free to let me know. :) I think we're all bitches and assholes and jerks and fuckfaces and assclowns now and again...myself included. If you can't bear that I have imperfect moments, or that I might react with hostility after being antagonized for several days, then you shouldn't expect me to be understanding when you have your imperfect moments. We're all human beings...except maybe that guy in the corner...he might be a pod person. (That pod person thing was sarcasm.) ;)
Oh, and I answer this one a lot. Really, everyone, is it such a mystery why I might be dark, snarky, or react in anger when mistreated? I'm not a robot or a pod person. Please stop pretending to be surprised when I am a human like you who has friends, a family, problems that aren't your business, problematic clients, problematic wanna-be clients, a life outside of work, and who likes to be paid to do her job, and etc. I'm a human and not infallible. Accept it, please.
Hope that was helpful! It would be really nice if some of you took the time to do things like read the Questions You've Asked Me archives. Please check that out before contacting me. :)
If you receive contact from a female seeking reconciliation help or readings within the next few months with the initials RP, please contact me. I'll give full details of this individual (so you can make sure you're not endangering yourself by taking her business,) a person who, ever since she couldn't manage a sensible discussion with me, has been sending me incredibly rude emails after my refusal to let her hire me, and refused to give "free" assistance (because things I get paid to do are things I don't do for free, lol.) It's unfortunate, but because she couldn't manage to act sane, I've had to call the police and alert them that she is obviously mentally unsound. She's sent me nothing but insults and rude language, which, to be fair, is quite the over-reaction for my saying no, I can't be of service. :P
If you are a potential client or a blog-reader seeking my assistance, and do not want to appear in a post such as this, do not call me names, harass me, email me rude shit over and over when I've asked you to stop contacting me, or take it to such a level that I have to alert the police about your behavior. I get about 4 of these crazies every year, and my way of dealing with them is to make sure no other professional spellworker or reader is forced to deal with them. :P
While this post was originally intended to be temporary and only up for 2 months, I'll be leaving this up permanently to warn all other workers, as this individual has proved to be the third most mentally-unsound person I've ever dealt with...which is saying quite a bit. :(
THIS IS MY INBOX ALL DAY TODAY (I'll spare you some of the more graphic ones, but this is what my inbox looks like. My commentary below):
From: r*** p********
Sent: Thursday, April 10, 2014 12:51 PM
Subject: Your bipolar
Your not God girl drama queen bye bye
This is interesting, (it's oft repeated by her,) as I've never told her I'm God, that I want to be God (I don't,) nor have I been the melodramatic one. This is still going hours after I posted this, and I'm not at all acting insane. Also it's "you're" not your. I don't have a bi-polar, nor do I show signs of being bi-polar, but the author of the above is showing signs of mania.
Being as I'm in my mid-thirties at this writing, I'm also no longer really able to be referred to as "girl." I'm a woman.
From: r*** p********
Sent: Thursday, April 10, 2014 12:59 PM
Your a rude Bitch u wish u was God don't text me fuck you girl your biplar for real
Again, the author above does not understand the difference between "your" as in this is your sock, and "you're" which is a contraction for "you are." I'm not being a rude female dog in heat, and I'm not texting her. In fact, I don't have her phone number, so I couldn't text her if I wanted to. She doesn't have my phone number, so she also is incapable of texting me.
Since my initial isn't "U," I'm going to assume this means "you," in this context. I do not wish I was God, and again, I've never given any impression that I wanted to be the Almighty to this person. I can't say I've even said anything that would give anyone the impression that I want to be God when speaking with this individual. I really have no desire to have THAT MUCH responsibility, including the responsibility for making this seemingly-unsound person.
I'm not the one being rude here...so she's projecting. To be fair, I'm more worried for this person's safety than I am offended.
And again, I show no signs of mania or cycling, so I'm not bipolar. My name is also not Biplar, so I'm not sure why this keeps getting thrown on me.
Since I'm not a lesbian, and even if I "switched teams," I'd not pick a mentally ill woman for a partner, I do decline the offer to "fuck." I've absolutely no attraction to this person.
As for the "bye" theme...er, I asked her to stop contacting me more than 24 hours ago. I think she's the one that might need to go "bye." Again, I'm not really clear on how I need to be told bye-bye...already said that to her. :(
I really don't understand why she is so devoted to repeatedly telling me off for having declined to be of service, because I'd not do a service for free that costs money. I don't understand how it's offensive of me to refuse to do my paying job for free. I do actually wonder if she punches people in the face for not having a product in stock or something, because this is an overwhelming amount of unsolicited rapidly-sent rude emails over my declining to be of service. Wow.
Well, I'm assuming the police are speaking with her now, and I really hope she gets the mental help she desperately needs. If any of you pray to St Dymphna, please light a candle for this person. I already have. Poor thing really needs to get some professional psychological help. :/
I'm sure, fellow readers, practitioners (and those who fear they might become a featured "no hire") that you can now understand how this person made an appearance on the blog. :( It takes someone lacking any manners or sanity to get featured. The last one decided I'd tell her to tie coffee to herself, and called me a c*** merely for asking for clarification on what she meant by other workers had misled her....so you need to really be bad for me to say anything. :/
UPDATE 4/12/2014 - So this person emailed me 2x at 1am to tell me off again. Obviously, I wasn't awake to read that, but I'm letting everyone who offers services or even writes a blog...if it's initials RP and a female, please contact me so you can IGNORE this person if she shows up in your inbox... She's going to stalk and harass if you don't. :( I will happily pass on the details in a private message if you need them.
Everything is abusive language, delusional accusations, and always about how I'm apparently "bipolar" which I don't think she understands what that is. I'm not showing signs of mania. I've not even responded in days, so I'm not sure what's setting her off...if it's this post, the post is not coming down (no one deserves to be treated in the manner she's behaved towards me, so it's a warning for others,) and I've saved all the emails for anyone who wants a look (privately.) Anyhow, off to forward this stuff to the police. :/
It's time for another wonderful installment of questions you've asked me.
Q: I broke up with so and so, and s/he was right about how I failed them. I totally want to make it up to them now, and I keep telling them that, but they won't listen. S/He tells me to stop contacting her/him and is trying to ignore me. How do I do a spell to make them listen to me? I know if they know I will do what they want, that I can fix this!
A: For starters, since the above person is so big on how they can listen now, the first problem is...well, that person just isn't listening. Re-read that question. How is contacting someone who asked you to stop contacting them listening to them? Because if you're listening to them, you're not hearing them. Nothing is absorbing. Want to be a good listener? Do as they ask. Stop contacting them. All you are doing by NOT hearing them is being disrespectful to their needs, and not listening to anyone but yourself (so not listening to them.) That's all you're accomplishing.
If you do not take the advice to stop contacting them and asking them to just hear you, all you accomplish is making yourself be remembered badly. You're the self-absorbed ass that just does not get it. Because you really don't get it. Until you stop harassing that person who has asked you to please stop, all you accomplish is pushing them farther away.
You just feel me slap you on the back of your hand? That's me trying to make sure you stop acting like a panicked child, and that you listen to me, and DO NOT send that text. Because you're a listener, right? If not, you just keep pushing that ex you "love" away, because you can't control your douchebag response.
You will not be forgotten, but you will be remembered poorly if you can't control yourself. Immediately stop stalking your ex. No more FaceBook/social media spying. No more texts. No more calls. No more asking through shared friends what so and so is doing. We've been over this in here before.
Now, if you can manage to stop panicking and acting like a frightened animal and accomplish the first step of "stop acting when you're scared, hurt, and panicked," you might yet salvage your relationship with that person. However, you have to forgive yourself for whatever you did wrong. Think you can do that? I don't care if so-and-so forgives you, because it's not relevant to whether or not you forgive you. You can say it is, but it's not.
Once you forgive yourself, you will begin to heal. When you are not crazy with pain and fear, you will be able to think tactically also. That's a very important thing when it comes to reconciliation - tactics are your friend. Crazy hurt people don't have tactics. People who have come to terms with what happened, have forgiven themselves for their mistakes, and who have a still mind do have tactics. Choose which one you want to be.
Then start with reconciliation spellwork when you're ready. I find reconciliation targets are so much easier to bring back when the petitioner (person for who the spell is cast on behalf of,) is not acting like an obsessive and insane person - and the target more willing to believe the petitioner has changed for the better when the petitioner isn't acting insane too. So...want to be heard? Calm down, collect yourself, stop acting out, and THEN do some spells. It should work if you can do that.
Q: Is there a "best time of day" to do spells?
A: I personally use planetary hours when I can. Since those are changeable by when the sun rises, I can't give you a time of day that will always work - you would need to calculate it. While I do know of systems where dawn, noon, dusk, midnight, etc are how people gauge what time of day to spellcast, I personally prefer planetary hours over that system.
That said, if you're new to spells, learning to actually cast a spell might mean you need to stick a pin in "time of day" questions until you've cut your teeth on some simpler spells and are a bit more acquainted with the process. Basically, you've got to learn to make the entree before you start worrying if you should add a dash of salt to it. ;)
Q: I found a cool tarot app for my phone. Do think this works?
A: Probably not. A few friends and I actually picked up a few of these, and while they might help you learn how certain spreads were read, I didn't find any of the readings on the mark for anyone - in fact some were so ridiculous it was almost humorous. The opinion was shared by the others who tried.
See, tarot cards are a tool, but not one, in my opinion, that's ready right out of the box. :P Would that it were so easy to have "seasoned" cards. And yeah, they need to get seasoned to work at the peak capacity for the owner of the cards, which means they are treated in a manner to make them attached to only you. My method for seasoning a deck starts with me taking the brand-new, never-used cards out of the box and shuffling. And shuffling, and shuffling, and shuffling. Then after they've gotten a good 30-60 minutes of it, I put them under my pillow. Then I sleep on them (which I will continue to do so for at least a year.) The next day I shuffle the cards or hold them whenever I get the chance which I continue to do for months. They need constant contact. However, after the first 7-14 days of just shuffling my cards and holding them when they aren't under my pillow, I will lie out my first spread. The first question is often one I know the answer to, though in subsequent spreads I'll ask things I'd LIKE TO KNOW the answer to. I check how accurate it is. I then go back to shuffling, holding, sleeping upon. So, at least every other day after I've laid out the initial spread, I use them to read. I should be using them every day but it's hard to come up with questions I need to know anything about. I will continue to work these cards for AT LEAST six months before I consider them seasoned, though generally I prefer about a year. During this time, absolutely NO OTHER HUMAN is to come in contact with this deck. Ever. When I've finished seasoning them, I can dispose of my "working deck" be that the one I am using for work (if that's the one I'm replacing) or for myself (if that's the one I'm replacing.)
Some people burn their deck and let the smoke go into the new one once they are done seasoning their new deck. I can see how this is a useful trick if you liked your old deck's energies, but if you've found your old deck is not living up to your standards, I'd not add it's smoke to your new seasoned deck.
In fact, I have found if I over-use a deck for my clients, it starts to feel "dirty" because too many of my client's energies have permeated my deck...but that does (at least for me,) take a few years for the deck to get "dirtied" to a point I can notice it...perhaps because I don't let anyone handle my cards even after the seasoning process is complete.
Now, don't get me wrong, in a live reading, you would momentarily handle my cards. Of course rare is it that someone is in my home for a reading. I do most of my readings via phone. So, in many ways, by less molestation of my deck by alien hands (by which I mean hands which aren't mine, and not actually extra-terrestrial's hands,) my deck lasts longer. At least in my opinion.
So, after that lengthy discourse on seasoning a deck, please let me know how you will season that virtual deck in your phone the same way so it has the same energies as a physical deck has, because, as I said, a deck of tarot cards is not really a tool I consider to be ready for real use out of the box. It can still be played with if you don't season it, and hell, I can read a deck of playing cards in a pinch, but there is no comparison to a seasoned deck vs an unseasoned one when it comes to accuracy, in my opinion.
Q: Who will be the more effective person in casting my spell - an expert or myself? (Implied: the asker has little to no experience in spellcasting.)
A: The expert. Always. Anyone who is an expert at a thing will always do a better job than a novice, and will always be the more effective at whatever they are an expert at than a novice could hope to be. Anyone who tells you otherwise is probably trying to sell you spell supplies. ;)
I love that people want to learn spellcasting, and I encourage you to learn to do it for yourself. I think it's great that you want to learn to spellcast and to be a master spellcaster. That said, I've answered this very question several times in here, and the answer remains the same. Experts are always better than novices. :P You having an attachment to the situation is actually often an impediment and not something helpful as well. Why? Oh, how many times have we discussed thinking it to death, kiddos? ;)
Q: I do my spells slightly differently than you - am I doing them right?
A: There is a possibility you are and there is a possibility you aren't. If you're unsure enough to ask me, my stock answer would normally be that I do things how I do them from 25ish years of experience in spellcasting telling me that's the right way to do those things. If you base your methods on a similar level of experience, by all means, do them your way.
I'm not against trying new methods, and have heard other expert magician's methods of spellcasting which intrigued me, and which I tried (Jason Miller, for example, taught me some very interesting methods of casting a circle which I'd not seen before, and which I felt were very effective, it's just as a Hoodooist, it's rare for me to use a magic circle,) but that doesn't mean I'd go and change how I suggest you do the same stuff. In fact, if I start suggesting you cast magic circles in here, the Hermeticists finally won me over to their team entirely and can claim me as their own, instead of just the peripheral dabbler in Hermetics that they know me to be.
So, while I try new stuff whenever I get a chance, I do actually try to post things which are tried and tested, things I'm experienced with using. My experimental stuff might be interesting to some of you, but I'd rather post what I have made work on more than one occasion. I find that's the best way to help my readers to be successful. If your method differs slightly from mine, then I suspect you have a good reason for that (like that's what you were taught and how you practiced for a few years, or maybe you've cut your teeth enough to start making your brand of spellcasting tailored to you.) If you're just tossing stuff together like a jackass, though, and you're a noob, you probably want to read my semi-recent post regarding faking it til you make it. There is stupid for the case of being willfully stupid, and there really is no excuse for that. Don't throw cherries on something because you, like, totally, like, felt, like, that was going to help (and yet when that ingredient has no basis in being helpful in whatever spell you're trying to accomplish, it probably, like totally, is like totally a bad idea and stuffs, and like and stuff,) because I assure you, it's normally hubris -and not divine inspiration- when I hear things like that, and hubris makes for one painful teacher. ;)
Q: I know you probably get asked this frequently, but what are the mistakes you see people making the most?
A: With their own spells it's going all over the internet to locate spells to cast (many of which are of a dubious nature at best) of varying paradigms - many of which are not based on real spellcraft and were made up on the fly by some over-excited noob, - purchasing worthless ritual supply, using "review" sites, thinking their spells to death in a group setting, trying to use St Expedite for love, using "fast luck" on reconciliation, and people saying they are past the beginner stage when they have only done simple candle spells. And, of course, thinking their work to death has to be repeated. Stop thinking your work unto death, people. Staaaaaahhhp!
With purchasing work it's: using "review" sites, listening to people as ignorant as themselves for advice on who to work with, not paying attention to how the worker they solicit gauges whether or not they can work with the client (if they accept anyone and anything, then you're probably dealing with a fraud,) not doing actual research (which means not using Google in this case, or at least only using it to find educational pages like Wikipedia,) on how certain cultures and paradigms cast spells (because if you're not clueless on how it's done you won't be so easily fooled,) being rude and ill-mannered to a worker, thinking super expensive or super cheap are going to net good results (usually neither - you want someone in the middle,) and that some people still actually think California Astrology Association is legit despite that being hugely laughable and obviously false. :)
Q: Wait...if tarot cards are as old as I think they are, why do you say the card of naked Ryan Gosling didn't come up?
A: Because I was making an attempt at being humorous. Also, if that card did exist, my drool would have already made it unusable. I would drink that man's bathwater. ;)
Hope that has been educational, my dear occulties, and I do hope to get a spell up for you in the next few days as promised on my Twitter. :)
I know I promised a Questions You've Asked Me article by today. It's even sitting here almost finished and I've not touched it. I was in fact chatting with RO today when I got some terrible news. A dear friend of mine had passed away.
I would not say I am often an eloquent woman, and perhaps no words I can speak on her behalf would do her justice, but I do know she would not care if I was inelegant, but would rather care more than I would just say how I cared, and mean each word, so Shea, this is for you.
If I never told you that I knew you felt things more deeply than most of us, I'm sorry. It's one thing I always knew about you. It's something I always loved in you, and will continue to, always. You never once made me doubt you were on my side, and you always seemed to understand everything I told you. I have had some true friends, but only a few, and you were one, and one of the shinier gems I've found in this world.
Your love of anime, our shared fear of spiders (including the one that held us hostage so we could not ever get to graphic design class - ew furry jumpy spider!!!) all the times we got dressed up in my formal dresses and pointed and laughed at anyone who dare point and laugh at two ladies dressed so fine and so fabulously are all things I remember about you fondly. There were drinks, there were boys, there was late night dancing, and we were never too far off from our next adventure. I know there were sad times, times we cried or felt like giving up, but my memories involve wild shenanigans and so much laughter that the sad times are more of a shadow than a memory.
You are irreplaceable, indescribable, and so wonderful. I can never be thankful enough for having been someone important in your life, because knowing you has been a gift.
On an old photo in facebook, maybe a year or so old, you call me your beautiful angel. It would seem you got that one thing backwards. You left me first, so it is me who has a beautiful angel, and that, my beloved friend, is you.
Rest well, Shea-Shay. I love you more than words can express.
"But when you come and all the flowers are dying
If I am dead, as dead I well may be
You'll come and find the place where I am lying
And kneel and say an 'Ave' there for me
"And I shall hear the soft heel tread above me
And all my rest will warmer, sweeter be
For you will kneel and tell me that you love me
And I shall sleep in peace until you come to me." -from Danny Boy
Since it will be asked of me, the above was taken when I was 22-23, and Shea is 21. We're at a bar called Jigger's that went out of business a long time ago but which was a truly kickass establishment. While I'm sure we probably are both drunk or getting there, it was a dark bar, and every picture of anyone I have seen from that place or personally have had for myself, everyone's eyes are as big as dinner plates. At Jiggers, they served strong cocktails in pint-glasses, so no one really had to do more than drink there. Your liver started crying the moment you started down the stairs. ;)
For those of you who know the day I had yesterday (entire-day-wasting-assclown-applicant,) this post is probably one you knew was coming. I think I actually post about one of these articles per year, lol. For those of you unfamiliar with me, or my work, etc., this might be helpful if you're looking to work with a professional spellcaster. Certainly, the professional spellcasters I know would probably like you to read this and keep it in mind. ;)
1. Be honest. Be forthcoming (not TMI level - we don't need to know sex positions you and your ex liked, but we do need to know some details,) about the problem. While there is such a thing as too much unneeded information (it really doesn't matter what outfits you both wore each day, or that his dog's name is Tiddles and you think that's adorable,) there is also way too little information. If you wrote me 2 sentences on what you want my help on, then I probably can't diagnose the situation well. There isn't one reconciliation spell for all problems. There isn't one love spell. There are thousands if not millions if not billions and or trillions of love and reconciliation spells. The same thing goes for money spells, controlling spells, curses, and move your neighbor spells. If you have a love problem, not all love spells will be suitable. Without having discussed the problem with you, I can't know which one/s to apply. The same is true for money, cursing, job spells, and basically any spell you can think of.
2. Read all the information the worker asks you to read before contacting them to see if you can hire them for work. Check out their frequently asked questions section. It's incredibly time-saving when all that information I spent hours writing out is something I don't have to rewrite personally for someone. I know my peers feel the same way. It also helps me know who is a responsible and trustworthy person - people who read directions, and help themselves are responsible people. People who don't follow basic (sometimes mandatory) instructions are the people who park in handicapped zones and block fire hydrants and then blame others when they get ticketed (so they are self-defeating assclowns, that make society worse for others.)
3. Remember there are a lot of people who do the same jobs we do, or who pretend to do the same job we do (the second kind is the fake kind.) ;) We are not going to be familiar with every business selling spells, ritual items, or occult-related-items/services, nor will we know their owners. So, if you had a bad experience with a place called "SomeonesSpellSiteThatSellsSpells.com," there is a chance that another worker knows nothing of that business. HOWEVER, if you come in hollering about being scammed by this person and that person, what often goes through a worker's mind is NOT that you've been scammed - it's that whatever happened to you (scam or not,) you're volatile, you may be impatient, you're eager to bad mouth anyone, and you are probably a risk as a client because, with an attitude like yours, we're probably going to pay for the previous person's mistakes with you - IF we accept your business. Furthermore, we may very well know who you speak of, we might be friendly with that person, which has it's own consequences.
I guess, to dumb this down (it needs to be) if you tell your new lawyer, all lawyers are lying, cheating, fakes - think they want to help? If you tell your doctor that all doctors you know are lying quacks and know nothing about medicine, think they want to help? If you go to McDonald's and tell them all the people who ever waited on you got complained about to the manager, think they want to wait on you? If you go into an architect's office and tell him or her that you've never seen a building designed right and from what you can see, his/her work could easily suck as well, think they want to help you build? The answer is no, all those people find you rude, and scary. They don't think you want to challenge them in a good way - they think you're contacting them to take out an old grudge on someone else using them as the substitute for that someone else.
And keep in mind, clients get reputations, too. If you're always acting awful to your workers, if you run all over the internet getting readings and spells from everyone, if you post on- or use- spellcaster review sites...you probably are already known, and not in a good way. For fictional and example purposes, let's make up a shop called "Brother Smyth's Handmade Ritual Wands and Bowls - if you post a review like "Brother Smyth was OK, he's pretty nice. I waved his wand that I bought (price was a bit high, I think, because handcrafted copper and semi-precious gemstones over organic applewood that's been chanted over 78 times, and inscribed with hermetic sigils burned into the wood at the right hour of Venus on a Friday when the moon is in Scorpio isn't really worth $309, right?)-" *Cat's note- that would actually be a fair and low price, at this writing, IMHO* "-but even right after waving it in the air, I didn't instantly get my ex back. I also tried holding it and wishing on it. Nothing. So, he's nice but his stuff isn't effective."
To translate that to what a worker or someone knowledgeable about the occult sees when they read that review, "I purchased a quality handmade item from a reputable occultist. I have no idea how to use it. I probably use a screwdriver to unclog my toilet and a plunger to put in screws, because that would equate my level of ignorance with occult tools. I paid a lot of money, and so since I can't properly use this occult tool, I blame someone else for my own ignorance on how magic or the occult works, and I'm going to ruin this small business's reputation. If you help me, I'll ruin you too, because I'm a thoughtless, ignorant knob." Now, the fictional Brother Smyth? He already knows who you are now. You reviewed a one-of-a-kind item, but your codename on that review site would not have helped, because he probably makes 2 sales a day at best. He might have shared your real name and contact info with others so they don't suffer bad reviews from your ignorance, and you just lost a good deal of real occultists who will sell you items or services. The fakes will still "help" though. Those "review sites" are public, and so...you just committed a huge faux pas.
Real spellcasters? We don't make tons of sales a day. Ten new spell sales a week would be so epic for me, that I'd probably have to shut down new orders for a week. If I handmade you an item described like the above, it's probably one-of-a-kind, so I'd know who you were. Also, the review you wrote (to other people probably as ignorant as one would have to be to think you wave a wand in the air and make wishes to use it,) will now impact that person's business forever. This fictional guy? He's making items that probably took him several days to make. He did it using traditional methods, using lots of prayer and using all his energy - and you just shit all over it to people, several of whom are likely as ignorant about how this stuff should work as you are, and called it ineffective. That's his sole source of income, and because someone ignorant can't properly use a tool, they gave him a poor review because he can't make a fictional wand that grants wishes just by waving it (no one I know can, because you don't use a wand like that.) Since a wand is just a tool, if it's not wielded by person who knows how to use it, it won't really be that effective. Even the finest ritual items and tools need will and intent, and the wisdom to be used properly. So basically, that review was like if you could take down the entire line of Craftsman tools just because you reviewed to a group that you bought a hammer from them once, swung it around in the air, and a new house didn't build itself when you did. Soooo, after that explanation, do you think a real occultist wants to work with someone like that, and do you understand why someone who behaves like the above fictional reviewer gets a bad client rep? ;)
4. Avoid the spellcasters offering health-related or body-related spells. This is a huge legal death zone (as in it's a very slippery-slope legally,) and I don't believe that I know anyone (at this writing) who is reputable who would take a chance and offer it for sale. Further there are no clear skin spells I know of, or boobs and dick growing spells I've ever heard of, lol, though they might exist. If a spellcaster is offering to make your skin clear up, your boobs or penis grow, your hair turn another color, or for you to lose weight, there is a strong chance they are fake. If they are selling you a full ritual (for any purpose, not just health) for under $20 (and I don't mean they will set a light which means light one candle,) they are probably not doing anything for you either. My materials cost way more than $20 just to do a full ritual. ;) So, avoid those spellcasters, but remember if you ask someone like me for a weight-loss spell, I'm probably going to tell you to go to the doctor and ask for diet advice, OR I'll say "I've found reducing my food intake and being more active helps me lose weight, so there's my weight-loss spell for you, and it's free. Exercise, eat less, and abracadabra, you will slowly lose weight." ;)
5. Remember, we work long, long hours, and deserve compensation for our time. At least 4-5 times a year, I get someone very inconsiderate in my inbox who demands I spend hours of free time helping explain how to cast spells to them - to be their own personal free spell-tutor. The thing is, that's a paid service. It costs money for a few reasons: 1.) I don't have unlimited free time. 2.) I don't particularly enjoy repeating simple basic concepts over and over especially when I've publicly explained several here. 3.) I don't do my job for free because I deserve to be compensated for my time like everyone else. 4.) I have people who can, will, and do pay me to do exactly what you're asking me to do for free, so I work for them instead. That's not an all inclusive list, but I think you're getting the point. ;) So, if you've just kept someone a few hours in consultation, and then decide you're not going to pay, you've just done the equivalent of getting your hair dyed and cut and not paying the hairdresser, or the same thing as getting your tooth filled and not paying the dentist, or even asking a specialist to come in and look at your mold problem, and then not paying him or her for the 2 hours spent on your house.
Every block of time you spend "chatting" with a professional spellworker or occultist that you are not compensating them for is a form of theft, IMHO. If my clients will get about three hours of my time typing (just includes the time I spend typing) for each spell they purchase (so this is their support and instruction and me answering their questions during the manifestation phase, - part of the spell price,) and you just had me spend 3 hours with you so I could discuss your problems with you when you didn't buy anything and have no intention of paying me for that time...do you think you're being abusive? Because you are if you don't intend to pay me or the person you're speaking with for those three hours. See number 3 for your new reputation. ;)
I know everyone wants something for free, but everyone also wants to be compensated for doing their job. Keep that in mind, be polite, don't take up a lot of your wouldbe spellworker's time, and we won't mind spending an extra five or ten minutes helping you, often for free. ;)
6. Remember, don't ask a question if you don't want the honest answer. If I'm in a reading, and you ask me if someone's ever coming back, and the answer is no? Don't kill the messenger. The answer was no, I was honest. Get a second opinion or pay someone to tell you what to hear, but don't blame me if what I picked up was the answer you didn't want to hear. That goes with spells, too. Do you REALLY want to know if I think a spell can make you a surgeon when you don't even have a high school degree? The answer is no, one spell can't do that. ;) DO NOT attack a worker for being honest to you. There are people out there that will tell you ANYTHING you want to hear, but if it sounds too good to be true, there is a good chance they are lying. I've had to tell people with problems that really did not seem so bad, but that I felt like I'd be ineffective in getting them what they requested (I just picked it up,) and couldn't help them for that reason, so it's not often even personal if someone tells you that they can't help you.
I hope this list has been helpful to clients and workers alike.
As I've said a trillion times (and even used an auto-responder to reinforce this,) for several years, that misscat@ email is just an email for forms to use to arrive to me. So when you write something to me via that email, you get a spam back telling you to fill out these forms if you want me to read your mail. If you don't fill out the proper form to contact me, you won't get a reply from me. I get a lot of email at this "misscat@(mywebsite).com" that never ever filters into my proper email. I delete it. People who don't follow instructions are no one I need to spend time with, so if you're waiting on a reply for an email you sent through misscat@ don't wait because no reply is on the way. I'd change it, but TypePad (the company this blog is published through) won't allow me to put a URL for my contact email so you can use the right contact page. Sorry. :/
If you sent me something via misscat@ and then didn't fill out the right forms, and are waiting for a reply, then stop waiting, because you'll never hear from me. ;)
Sometimes you want to know if I offer services. Yep, if you go to http://originalninjacat.com you'll see I've been offering services for ten years now.
Sometimes you want advice on spellcasting. If it's not directly relating to an article, and/or is much more than simple clarification you might want to purchase spell-coaching, which is me being your own personal tutor and helper learning how to cast that particular spell you wanted to cast, and yeah, it's a paid service. Please see my website to apply. Sorry, I don't have several unpaid hours to teach people spellcasting, but if you want to pay for my hours, I do have time for you. ;) If you're sad, I have this huge blog full of free spellcasting info (and even some relationship advice for my love addicts,) which is totally free of charge for you to read. I spent a lot of time on it, and I hope you enjoy what I've offered the public for free. However, if you would like something more specialized, that does cost money. :P
Sometimes you just contact me to see if you're an exception to one of my rules. No one is an exception to my rules. ;)
Sometimes you just want to write me in code. If u spel lik dis, u shld not xpect a rply. I do not speak text or bingo fluently, but then, no one over about 17 should. Write your words out like a grown person, please.
If you want to follow me on Twitter as many of you asked, follow me @CatAstrophied
*****THIS POST HAS MOVED DUE TO AN UNAUTHORIZED LINKING - Original date 12/15/13 - if you're using my links, please be sure you have my permission. If you don't have my permission to use my links, I will continue to change them until you get permission or get that you won't be getting permission. ;) Thanks! ****
Over the years, many of you have asked me where I get my super awesome "made at the right time, to exact specification" pentacles from the Greater Key of Solomon. While I've had more than one source, I have REALLY REALLY enjoyed working with RO's pentacles. He sent me a Jupiter pentacle, and 2 Venus pentacles recently. The day I received the Jupiter pentacle, I made 6x the sales I have been making recently. The specific Venus pentacles I purchased from him work sooo well, I'm surprised he's listing them for general purchase! I highly recommend these products to everyone (example pictured.)
If you're interested in purchasing your own, please click here!
As some of you might know, in many cases, I'm all for "faking it until you make it," to some degree. All of us our beginners at some point, and many of us will be book-taught or classroom-taught on some subject with our first moment of real-life application of said knowledge happening after the beginning of our cerebral-learning period. For example, if I wanted to repair a step on my stairs, I might first read a chapter in a book or an online how-to before I attempt to fix that stair. OR, I might just pull up the cracked/broken step, measure a board, cut it, and nail it where the broken step was WITHOUT consulting a book. I think many of us can agree there are things in life which might be done better WITH INSTRUCTION that can also often be competently done (albeit perhaps not the best done,) without.
So, using the example of the above "bad stair," what if I decided, with little to no woodworking experience, to rip down the whole stairway and replace it with a brand new stairway, made by myself, entirely by making it up in my head and applying my own knowledge of what this looks like by watching Mr NinjaCat's having made stairs and nothing else. (See, I've even seen someone do it before.) I have to be honest here...if I did that, I sure as hell hope none of you would use my stairway...or you'd probably be dead of a broken neck in my basement (the only stairs I can think of in my house that I could pull off or replace without gutting the house.) Sure, I understand to make 2 same size boards run diagonal at the same angle (being the same length,) and cut the same in a stair pattern. I understand where the boards go. I have seen this. However, with no help, I'm sure it would still be deadly. Or at least it would be ill-advised someone use my "Hahaha, I faked being able to be a carpenter long enough to nail this shit together and to my house" stairs.
OK, I know, I know, stairs are not the occult. They are not spellcasting. You want to know what in the sam-hell my stair talk has to do with spells. ;) Well, over the years, I've watched people do the equivalent of trying to do more than build a staircase without ever having done woodwork or carpentry, but even go so far as to comparatively attempt to build a HOUSE without having ever so much as built a spice rack, much less having the knowledge to make a broken lamp fixed in regards to spellwork. Guess what? Your honey jar? That's about as complicated as fixing a single stair, just replacing a board. That's good beginner work. HOWEVER, that super "easy" looking spell you found? To make it work, you better have the skill, or you might hurt yourself and others. :P Yeah, no, you can't just throw in that God or Goddess or spirit from x pantheon that you have a passing fancy for in with this being that you're calling in this spell. No, don't mix Erzulie and Oshun. That's naive and ridiculous. Uh, yeah, no, you've just told me I'm related to Woden and Jesus Christ - don't even cast spells, much less write books (true story, right now the craziest person with the least amount of magical ability possible, who used to tell me the craziest shit about magic that has nothing to do with real magic is right now a published author, and before you say "wasn't that a long time ago?" I assure you it was 4-5 at most that she was saying such nonsense - so make your book purchases carefully, too.) ;)
But humorously ignorant people aside, and obviously spiritually-and-magically-inept newbies trying to overdo it aside, my point here is that it's BETTER for you as a spellcaster to learn how to do the complicated-stuff right, rather than assume you have some natural gift for this type of work and it will all just come to you - you know you're an expert, after all, because you did a single candle spell once. :P I have a natural gift for this type of work and I've been studying the occult for 25 years, which is basically saying since I started going through puberty. I also had an interest in it as a wee one and still, even with my natural gift, I had to put my hours in studying and practicing. I studied, practiced, studied more, practiced more, etc daily for years (and I continue to practice and/or study on a daily basis,) to be where I am now. There is no class that will make you instantly-gifted. There is no such thing as graduating a class and becoming an able spellcaster or worker who could consider him or herself even "intermediate" level at working. There are a few OK classes out there - don't get me wrong - but when I graduated first-year spanish back in the seventh grade, there is no way I'd have been able to speak fluently to people down in Uruguay with my limited Spanish-language skills, and I took that class 5 days a week. How many times do you take your class a week? Is it at least 5 hours of class a week with homework that takes a few hours? Because if it's not, you're not even learning enough to be a first year "magic student" if such things existed. Let that absorb for a bit. :)
Or...let's think on how long it took you to learn arithmetic. Were you capable of doing division on fractions (with no calculator, of course,) by age eight? If not, why? I mean, you'd been learning basic math since at least first grade. Isn't that at least a whole year to learn elementary knowledge? And you were studying for hours a day then, which is more than your magic class you're taking now - you must have had some pretty "advanced" math skills if you had that many hours of learning and your magic class is going to make you advanced in as many hours.
Could you spell several words over ten letters long by age eight? Did you know what to defenestrate is? (It's to throw someone out a window.) If you just learned that now, why? I mean, you've been speaking English all of your fucking life, right (er, let's just pretend you have, heh)? Oh, because they didn't teach you in school? But there are all sorts of places to learn words, so why didn't you know that one? I mean, here you are, an adult, and you don't know all the words in the English language? Why? If you had so many hours to learn them, and whole parts of school were dedicated to broadening your vocabulary, why are you unfamiliar with words like verisimilitude and why do you not know "redundant"* doesn't mean really mean repetitive but superfluous? Because if your magic class can make you an expert or advanced or even an intermediate magician, then years of vocabulary should make you like the English language dictionary, and you should be familiar with what all common words (even commonly misused ones) mean - because if one class makes you an expert, then, why aren't you? ;)
The point I'm trying to make IS NOT that everyone here reading is a meat head. ;) It's actually that regardless of who you are, to become an expert magician, you will PROBABLY need about 10 years of work at least. AT LEAST. No single class is going to change that unless the class is so frequent that it's like taking a college level course, and even then, you'd only be "This Professor's Magic 101" level because magic is such a gigantic topic that you won't be "Ceremonialist 101" or "Hoodoo 101" in almost every case of every class I've seen out there. Your "100-levels" (in the USA 100-200 level courses are your university basic levels for Freshman/1st year and sophomore/2nd year, where you need to take several each year to get to your upper-level learning,) would need to be you taking a few of these classes every day, assuming you had the basics (a grade school k-12 education,) every day for at least the previous 6-7 years before arriving at magic school. Oh, and lets assume you have live time in the altar room with the professor at least weekly, too.
Oh, you didn't have any of that? Oh, it was a thing where someone sent you a mail every week? OK. That's fine. It's a good starting point. But just because you graduated someone's class, that doesn't mean you're even near my level of knowledge or the level of knowledge of several of my peers. You're still a beginner.
Can we agree on that? I know some online teachers won't, but the rest of us? Can we agree that if you study something a lot, you'd at least need a few years studying it and practicing it before anyone even thought you were out of the beginner stage?
I say this because recently I've been getting a lot of this in my inbox: "Hi Ms NinjaCat, I've been practicing spells forever, am an expert and gifted, and I want a giant fix-everything spell. I'm not afraid of calling spirits. I worked with Hecate a few times. Oh, and I like Isis." OK, so you read a few books once? ;) You're not an expert. Readers, can you identify how easy it is to see this person is not an expert?
If you were an expert, you'd know there is no such thing as a giant fix-everything spell. While I can assume you might have worked with some God-heads, I also don't believe you can just splat in some Grecian or Egyptian deities willy-nilly and call that "calling a spirit." If you've ever called an inhuman spirit, and not had a pants-shitting (or nearly-pants-shitting) experience, then you're in for a surprise when you really do call one. If you can control it. If you understand the dangers of that (cuz if you don't, don't call me crying at 3am that something disembodied keeps biting you.) And you've "worked with" Hecate and Isis. Define this to me. Did you do a regular devotional to either? Daily? Weekly? Did you have an altar set up to leave offerings to either? Did you regularly pray to either? What was your relationship with these beings?
If your answer was "None really. I called them using this Llewellyn book to watch over my love mojo on this one case, and in the other to make sure I got this specific job, but I followed the instructions, and my spell worked and stuff."
So, if I go back to the beginning of my article with me trying to build stairs. The person who "read a book" and "called Hecate and Isis" comparatively just ripped the stairwell off, cut some boards kind of right, nailed other boards to them, and now I have a deadly, crooked, creaking, about to fall off and fall-apart staircase. But you're an expert staircase maker, because you read a book once, right? Right. That's what many of you self-professed "experts" (and no, not you real experts, haha,) in my inbox are doing magically. You're inept, you're obviously not an expert, and the worst thing you're doing is faking to yourself that you can do this. No, some light candle spells and a honey jar is not expert work. Throwing in cherries because it "felt right" when cherry bark, and cherries are not at all correspondent to your working is not you being inspired by spirit. It's probably you thinking you're so magical that you fart fairy dust. I'm a pretty magical person - I don't fart fairy dust (unless I eat 2lbs of glitter, and then it looks like fairy dust,) so I'm pretty sure you don't either. I'm psychic, I've studied psychicism, and I can tell made up crap from real experiences...if you haven't ever experienced psychicism or studied it, you do a bad job trying to pretend you have. Like if 5 disembodied voices/beings follow you around 24/7 and you see them 24/7, you might want to consult a psychiatrist, not a psychic.
"Fake it til you make it" is meant for people who are on the precipice of being what they want to be. It doesn't work it for someone who has a high school education and is doing nothing more than dressing as a brain surgeon and telling themselves they are one, and operating on people. Nope, "Fake it til you make it," might apply to the resident learning brain surgery - the one who did years and years of school and study to get there, not to the person who saw a Hollywood movie where people did brain surgery. So "Fake it til you make it" does not make a noob who has done a few honey jars and single candle spells into an expert. Reading a book once won't make you an expert. Taking a class once won't make you an expert. You can't fake that much - you're too ignorant. We all would be too ignorant with so little learning and practice under our belts.
I'm not trying to be discouraging - I want people to learn to cast their own spells, I want them to learn about the occult; - but for goodness' sake, if you're not an expert, don't pretend to be one. It actually makes you less of a moron to admit you're just starting out, or that your skills are novice. It helps you for you to admit to yourself that you still have lots to learn, because then you won't have as many problems that the grossly hubris-tic students of the occult often have (see above, pants-shitting spirit-raising,) when they didn't expect said problems. :P People would rather teach a person who wants to learn, not the pretend know it all (see above, I'm related to Jesus and Woden?? no, that's stupid.) I would rather you start out with "I know nothing. I did a few candle spells once, so I have that much experience under my belt, but when it comes to setting up an altar to a deity, I'm kind of clueless," than pretend to be an expert. It's very visible when you're not. :P
There is no shame in being a beginner. None. We all had to be beginners once. We all had the NOOBIEST NOOB MOMENTS. Right now, any real spellcaster or magician who's the real-deal has more than one "NOOBIEST OF THE NOOB" stories - I know this, because I've exchanged a few, and some of them are downright scary and hilarious at the same time. Now, I understand - if you were 18 and just starting out on your higher education, you'd feel no shame saying "I'm going to college/university to learn meteorology," but if you didn't get that interest until you were 30, would you tell people you were a meteorologist because you're an adult and don't want to be thought of as a novice? I mean, you have no school in it, but you like to watch the weather. Yeah, so you're not a meteorologist...not even close. ;) That's what you're doing when you pretend to be an expert, or even intermediate-, spellcaster and you're not. It shows. You're not faking it til you make it. You're being an assclown. No expert ever got to be an expert by not ever being a beginner. There is no shame in being a beginner. There is no shame in being annoyed that getting past the beginner stage is a longer time-investment and greater effort than you'd hoped. ;) There is no shame in falling on your face because you attempted something a bit more advanced than you were ready for - the shame comes when you don't admit you made the mistake or when you pretend you're some sort of expert that you're not - especially if you then mis-teach others with your NON-expert advice.
So, I guess my long, rambling diatribe is summed up best with be happy to learn, know yourself, and try to avoid putting on airs. If you get to the beginner stage, you'll wow the noobs. If you get to the intermediate stage, you'll wow the beginners. If you get to the advanced stage, you'll wow the intermediates, and if you get to the expert stage, you'll be wowing everyone. It's an earned thing. It takes work to get there. But even the fact that you're investing the time and effort to try to start at the beginning to learn this stuff? That's something to be proud of. If being an expert in anything was so easy to learn, it wouldn't be a valuable thing to be an expert, so be prepared for a long road of study and practice...and start "Faking it til you make it," when you're really close to being able to do whatever, you've put your learning in, you've applied your knowledge, but this is the first time you've PRACTICED something is when to "fake it." However, if you have to look everything up in books, can't tell me 10 uses for just the color of gold in spellcraft off of the top of your head in under 20 seconds, or what Monday is useful for if using days of the week, etc - you're not outside of the beginner, or perhaps even noob, stage. It's just what it is. Sorry if that's disappointing, but anything worth having (including having the "expert" title in a field of knowledge) is something earned through hard work.
Sorry for rambling on and on,
*While some people do use this as being repetitive, suchas "Cat said spell so often, the term became redundant" the actual meaning:
1. surplus to requirements; unnecessary or superfluous
2. verbose or tautological
3. (Business / Industrial Relations & HR Terms) deprived of one's job because it is no longer necessary for efficient operation he has been made redundant
4. (Engineering / General Engineering) (Electronics) (of components, information, etc.) duplicated or added as a precaution against failure, error, etc.
[from Latin redundans overflowing, from redundāre to run back, stream over; see redound]
Q: I've heard people do not use pure essential oils, but dilute strongly with another oil to avoid skin irritation. Is this true? If so, what oil do I dilute with?
A: Well, to be fair, the main concern many people "diluting" their own brand have is cost-savings, and not skin irritation, because even a half ounce of 100% pure essential oils is not cheap - not to add the smell would likely be mighty powerful. That said, while, arguably, something like Cleo May is more of a "magical perfume," most oils are anointing oils and not meant to be worn like a perfume. Would you dress yourself in Black Arts oil? I should hope not. I don't even handle my Black Arts oil with my bare skin, and NOT because I'm concerned about skin irritation. ;) So, many of the ritual oils for love smell nice, but technically they probably aren't meant to be a perfume, but an oil for ritual work. HOWEVER, some of these essentials cost their weight in gold, AND they smell super strong. Diluting the smell can be essential to one's nose. If you're selling the item, skin irritation is a concern. Someone's always wearing the love stuff as a perfume (usually without putting it on with any focused intention like they should be,) so many manufacturers of the good stuff will formulate it to smell yummy and be skin-safe.
As for what people use... if I am using a carrier oil, it's something which will have a corresponding vibration with what I'm trying to accomplish. For example, I use mineral oil for dark work. I have used hempseed oil as a carrier for money work, and it worked nicely. I know some people use almond oil with a preservative. I've used grapeseed oil with a preservative. Jojoba is a favorite of some people with love work. You want a low-or-no-scent oil for your carrier oil. I do find olive oil smokes A LOT, and so if I'm going to use it (I usually won't,) I will use it with peace or blessings spellwork.
Q: I was told to do a ritual bath, but I really don't want to get out of bed at dawn and/or throw my bathwater outside. It's a deal killer. What can I do?
A: While I would go so far as to say the argument would be if you didn't care enough to do those things, then you don't want the very thing you'd be bathing to bring to you (or to be rid of the very thing the bathing is taking off of you,) I'd also say if you can even take a ritual bath at any time and you let it go down the tub drain, that's probably better than doing nothing. :P Again, you should really do it as prescribed (ritual bathing is super awesome,) but just taking the bath itself is SUPER HELPFUL.
Really the tub water isn't so bad. I have stood in a large washbucket in my tub before -and it was easy to carry, just a few gallons of water. You can also make the bath in a bowl (I do it by using a tea-ball to hold the herbs,) and bathe using a cloth dipped in the solution. That way, you're not carrying a laundry basket of bathwater outside when you're done. ;)
Q: Tell me something super secret about spellcasting only you know!!!???!!!1!
A: I should probably add a "ZOMG" on that. ;) Hmmm, I assume (perhaps wrongly,) that this isn't something you want to know that only I know, because that would be a personal thing. ;) However, I can tell you something probably not that many people that are not you know. :D Rice paper dissolves in water. It's incredibly useful for influencing people. For example, to influence a lover, write a command in blood (generally from the right index finger,) on rice paper. Dissolve this in the lover's drink, and have them drink it to try to sway them to do as you say. Keep repeating as needed. Rice paper is sometimes used on cake's for decorative purposes, so it's entirely edible.