Good morning, Occulties,
So, I'm glad to have a client story to share this morning, and not only was it a welcome read (because Mercury decided to retrograde all over me before 9am, ha!) I'm even more grateful I was given permission to share. Names are all changed, of course.
Sometime around February, my client found that her soon to be ex had been maxed her credit card out by taking cash out...which is one of many reasons he's her ex. When she confronted Mr Jackass (not his real name) he replied that there was very little she could do about it as no court was going to uphold that he didn't have permission to use her credit cards as they had been together for 8 years, and he'd used them multiple times over 8 years without her ever complaining. Mind you, it wasn't as if she had a huge credit line, so what is it he had bought?
He had bought his side chick some new boobs is what he bought. :P And no, ladies and gentlemen, this wasn't reconstructive surgery after breast cancer - there is no hero aspect here, despite the cheating - it was that she was sick of being a B cup.
Understandably my client was livid. She had suspected the cheating, but wasn't sure, and now she was going to be paying off this girl's boobs because that cheating asshole broke up with her for "being such a bitch" about the money. Even worse, she wasn't the breadwinner to begin with, so technically, he could have paid using his own money, but now she's stuck with the bill and her household income is more than halved.
I've heard some crazy stuff in my day, but as you can imagine, this was inline to be one of the craziest damn things I ever heard. So she wanted her money back, and she wanted revenge. We started by breaking the "happy couple" up. This wasn't difficult. Ms Newbobies was not really too interested in my client's ex, but if he was dumb enough to spend all that money on her and get her new boobies, she wasn't going to say no. When he told her he might have to move in for a short time, Ms Newboobies didn't like that, and within a few weeks she had him move right out. Now Mr Jackass had very few options. His surviving parent lived three states away and he was an only child.
He tried to rent, but with the real estate boom, it was hard to find a rental. He was losing so much money on a hotel room that he wasn't really sure what to do, and mysteriously the hours at his job got cut back (it's not mysterious, we totally cursed him, haha,) and his friends, having heard all about Ms Newboobies, really didn't want him staying with them...they considered him (quite rightly) a thief. Finding himself friendless and alone, and with his resources rapidly dwindling, he reached out to my client and literally BEGGED HER to let him stay with her. Having seen the text messages, the man was clearly beyond desperate.
Of course, she didn't really want him around, because...well, um, look what he did. So she told him if he paid her credit card off, she would consider letting him stay. He told her he wasn't sure he could afford that, what with that he'd lost so much money but he'd see what he could do. So he sends her about half the amount. She says "Well that is only going to pay a third of what you owe because the interest is crazy when you take out cash on this card." He says he can't give her more because then he won't have enough to pay his hotel bill, but that he could pay her back if he just could stay with her.
Now at this point I suggest to her that she should have him put something worth money in her name as collateral. All we could think of was his car. So she tells him if he signs his car over to her - and it was a 2019 Lexus (I do not know the model) - then she will let him stay. Of course he balked at the idea, but she said she only wants it as collateral as he's done her dirty, and it's the only way she will believe he's sincere in paying her back. She has a car, but it's like a 2014 Ford of some kind, and so when he does sign over this Lexus to her, she says well OK, you can stay. I was surprised by this, but he comes back, and she doesn't speak much to him, but she lets him sleep on the couch. When he goes to take his car to work in the morning, she says no, you can take my Ford but I'm not letting you take my Lexus. He fusses with her, he argues, and she says "Fine, take the bus because if you take either car now, I'm going to call the police and tell them you are trying to steal my car."
Well, he took the bus, and when he comes into work they tell him they don't need him anymore. He's fired. At least that's what he told my client. We aren't sure but both agree he probably just quit or had been fired. :P He calls her from a nearby business and asks if she can pick him up and says he got fired. She asks why did you get fired? And he claims well because when he took the bus he was late so he got fired. She says she isn't about to let someone with no job stay with her. So after a fair amount of arguing, he spends the whole day looking for a job - any job, - and when he finally makes it home he swears he has a job.... at Taco Bell.
That's right, he's working at a Taco Bell according to him. This man had been working at a banking type job, and now he's serving you chalupas, so it wasn't exactly a step up. AND we weren't sure that he was working at Taco Bell.
She says, alright, and she lets him sleep on the couch. For about 2 weeks, he's coming and going and acting like he has a job. Meanwhile she's driving to her job in a shiny Lexus. Well, she gets a notice in the mail that the payment for that Lexus is due. She confronts him and says "This is your car loan, and why aren't you paying it?" He says well he doesn't make enough to pay it, and for all he cares they can come take that car since he wasn't getting to use it." So she tells him he can't take the Ford into work, and take the bus again.
Now he thinks she's just "punishing" him, and he goes on the bus that day. She had paid off her Ford so she sells the Ford before he even gets home. Now she's only got one car, and it's the Lexus...which he signed over to her. He about goes off the rails, so she kicks him out and gets a restraining order against him. Now he's got no car, and no place to live, and she's paid off that card with the money she made, and is driving around in a relatively new Lexus.
Oh, but it gets better.... After about a month of not hearing from him, a friend tells her that he's moved back with his surviving parent three states away, but not before telling anyone he could that his "crazy evil bitch ex" (my client) had destroyed his life, and he had nothing to show for it, not even the side piece he bought boobs for. So somewhere in around this time, Ms Newboobies reaches out to my client, and she says she feels badly because she found out that my client paid for her boobies, and that Mr Jackass had only "paid back maybe half" and she wouldn't wrong another woman. She sends her a check for $2000, which she admits is less than what was paid, but all she can spare, and hopes it will cover the difference.
So, my client came out with extra money, a Lexus, and my client's ex is destitute and jobless and moved three states away. Perfect!
That's one hell of a story. Thank you for letting me tell it!
~Cat
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